Recap of Mockingbird Lane

The pilot episode of the hopefully new show Mockingbird Lane, was interesting, entertaining and silly.

I have to say, I went on record (in the GetGlue thread for the show) saying that I think the weak link is the casting of Jerry O'Connell.  That was for the first half of the show, but midway, I sort of changed my mind.
The choice of Eddie Izzard as Grandpa was brilliant. 
The wardrobe given to Portia de Rossi, was a bit much.  The clothes did not suite the character at all. But her acting was just smug enough to hint at the fangs she's suppose to have.

The plot itself, felt rushed.  It would have been better if this had been a two hour movie. 
Personally, I'm in for this being expanded on and becoming a new series.  Even a short 8 part mini-series would make happy.   This has so much potential but I don't think it was given enough time on air in only an hour.

The oneliners were spot on, with jokes like telling Eddie he couldn't have any vegetables till he ate his meat.

I hope that NBC seriously considers giving this an honest try in a few months.

Wait till Your Vampire Gets Home-review

Book #4 in the Broken Heart series by Michele Bardsley.

Plot:  A paranormal investigator shows up in Broken Heart just in time to be attacked by two dragons in the middle of a deadly fight.  But she's not the only one, a recently turned vampire who was hanging around the tomb of his late wife, also finds himself caught.  Soon both are running from the one dragon while fighting their own passion for each other.

By introducing an entire new set of characters to the mythos, Bardsley manages to bring her series back from the edge {yeah my last post I talked about not caring that much for book #3}
Not much is really given about the already established characters from the first half of the series, but it does draw you in quickly.

The books in this series are easy to understand, they don't take themselves overly seriously but still manage to not be cheesy.  {if you're a fan of Buffy or Charmed you will understand what I mean} They are also highly addictive.

Because Your Vampire Said So- review

This is book 3 in the Broken Heart series by Michele Bardsley.

Plot:  Patsy the vampire who runs the local beauty salon, has just been told that she's the center of a prophecy.  Soon she's being hunted by half the Ancients, and finds herself able to copy their powers.  Can she handle suddenly being the queen of the undead, and keep her teenaged son in rehab?

I loved books 1 and 2 of the series, but this one left me cold.  It just felt way too Army of Darkness for me. {there is literally a scene where the lead character raised an army of zombies}

I don't know if this book was meant to be the end of the series originally, or if the author was just going through something major in her life and decided to make it as serious as she could? But it just felt out of place with the rest of the mythos already created in the other two books.

Don't Talk Back To Your Vampire -review

The second book in the popular Broken Heart  series by Michele Bardsley, is Don't Talk Back to Your Vampire.

Plot: Eva is a single mom who's been turned into a vampire like half the people in her small suburb. Her and her daughter are now being threatened by a group of rouge vampires and lycans.  As her powers grow, so does her attraction to the vampire prince.


I literally read this book in less then five hours.  I just could not put it down.
The author combines a modern 'reality' perfectly with Irish myth. You're drawn into the world completely with every sentence.  It's got a slight soap opera feel to it but that is what makes it so enjoyable.

There are a few scattered sex scenes, but thankfully they are so skillfully scattered and well written that it heightens the plot; and does not overwhelm the reader. {unlike so many other so called vampire stories that just feed you sex for no reason}

I originally did a review of the first book in the series on my old blog which you can read here

Vampire High- DVD

The 2001-2002 Canadian vampire soap was released not too long ago on DVD.
I just tracked down a copy. 

I was very disappointed to find out that there are no extras, and worst of all; only 3 episodes on the DVD.
This particular disk has episodes 5,6 and 7.

The episodes are in their original format and slightly grainy.

After viewing the DVD, I tracked down some information on the DVD release, and it seems that only the first 8 episodes were ever released on DVD.

The show was always a nice twist on the vampire genre, and still holds up a decade later.  But unless you are a collector I would by pass this. 

The Vampire Book -Review

This is the Third Edition of the very popular Encyclopedia of vampires by J. Gordon Melton PHD.   The original was published back in 1994, and the second edition in 1998-99.

The need for the update is obvious, as so much has taken place in the world of vampire fiction and fact in the last 13 years since the second edition.   With updates on Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Twilight etc.  What this volume lacks however is the one thing that made the original book back in 1994 the cultclassic it's become; and that is the intense listings of vampire movies/books/plays/shows.   The original was a mega centerpiece for any vampire collector's library.   This one is nice, but it just doesn't have that extra bite.

I can only hope that the Doctor has up his sleeve a second round of his Videohound's Vampire Film Guide.   {which was printed in 1997 and a collector's item as is the original 1994 First edition of the encyclopedia}

Scream Blacula Scream (1973)

Plot: After a voodoo priestess fails to chose her heir, the coven decide to vote for Lisa, her adopted daughter.  This makes Willis, her son jealous causing him to seek revenge.  He does a ritual for power which ends up bringing Blacula back from the grave.  Soon, after half the town is turned into vampires, Blacula realizes that Lisa being a very powerful priestess herself might be able to cure him.

This is the second movie to come out in the 1970's in the Blacula series.

I have to give credit to the fact its story is stronger and tighter then the original, and it definitely plays as a stand alone film.

CSI:Miami 2011 October

Every year one of the top television dramas do a vampire episode for Hallowe'en, this year CSI:Miami did theirs.

The plot runs around a murder in the house of a famous vampire writer, which at first looks like it was committed by a crazied fan.  As the course of the show progresses, we learn that it was done by the author's staff who are blackmailing her.

One of the better takes on vampire drama I've seen in a few year, and bonus points for having both Orlando Jones{From Dusk till Dawn 3 Hangman's Daughter, Vampire Assistant} and Johnathon Schaech{Forsaken, Masters of Horror} in it.

It's easy to understand why such a popular show would tackle such a popular topic as vampire authors given that they are the new breed of creature.  Some would even say the business of writing about vampires is a vampire in itself.  It's even created a subgenre of fans that would make the great Renfield run screaming for the hills... or laughing as he was known to do.

Happy Hallowe'en.

Witchcraft 13 Blood of the Choosen-2008

Plot: A lawyer/detective is following a series of ritualistic murders. The victims all have two things in common,  they're all men who's had their hearts removed.  He soon learns that it's the work of a powerful coven of witches who's behind the killings, as well as the fact all the men are warlocks.  Can he solve the case before it's too late?


Yes, this part of the famed Witchcraft series that started in the late 80's early 90's.  I seem to remember part 3 {The Kiss of Death}  having a bit of a vampire/incubus feel to it. Not too mention being just plan old bad; this however was nearly painful to sit through.  I do hope this is the last of the series.
It is out as part of an 8pack horror fest.

For an indie film, this had plot holes ontop of plot holes.  It keeps referring back to past films in the series, and if you are like me, you might have caught one or two of the really early episodes back twenty years or so ago, but other then that, most likely have not heard of the others in the series.
Being that it is part 13 in the series, it should have either given some back history for anyone not familiar with it's myths or it should have removed itself from the thinning thread of the mythology all other to be a stand alone.

For such a low-budget/no-budget indie film, the effects which were minimal were used to their extreme advantage, but the money should have gone into improving the sound of the film.

Fist of the Vampire -2007

Plot: A brutal murder happens in 1977, by a group of vampires as they attack a family.  30 years later, a cop goes undercover to bust up an underground fight ring, only the managers are the same vampires from 1977.  Can he defeat them or will he end up dead?


Let me say right off,  it was a bonus for me as one of the main characters is played by wrestler the Blue Meanie.

This was part of a 4pack {which I will get to the others at a later date} and when I saw the first few minutes of the film, wasn't too sure I was getting my money's worth {I paid $8 Canadian for the dvd pack}  as it is a low budget-indie film, but I was quickly surprised.

The vampire scenes are bloodsoaked, but the rest of the fights are kept to a minimum, which gets it's point across without being over cocky.  And the writing is witty enough to keep you laughing through some of the lesser scenes.
It does take about a half hour before it starts to gel, but it's a film to add to your watch list simply because it is a different take on the subject of vampires.

It's shot as a cross between the 'ploitation films of the 70's and a music video, giving itself just the right amount of grittiness for a vampire homegrown. 

The Element Encyclopedia of Vampires by Cheung

For a book that is roughly 3 pounds and claims to be the A-Z book on the topic of vampires, it really doesn't have anything new going for it at all.

I've been collecting these types of encyclopedias for the few decades, and honestly, have seen better.


This one is edited by Theresa Cheung, and is part of the Element Encyclopedia  series (others in the series include witchcraft, secret societies, mystical creatures etc)  and has limited drawings and most entries have only a short paragraph, compared to other books on the topic which give things their own page.

The only real plus this has for it are the quotes that start each new chapter.

The book is fine if you are thumbing through it at the library, but don't waste your time buying it.

Fright Night 2011

Plot: Charlie Brewster discovers that his next door neighbour is a vampire after people in the suburbian area where he lives keep disappearing.  After breaking into Gerry's house, he finds many of the missing people.  Now, with only the help of his girlfriend and a stage magician, he needs to destroy the vampire before sunrise.


This is without a doubt the only time I've seen a remake and thought it was worthy of having been done.
From the subtle changes in the characters, to the costumes, to the modern locations, this version of Fright Night not only held up it's promise to be a great horror film, it held up it's promise to be one of the best films in the last few years.

The vampire genre has been bleed dry as of late by the meek and watered down offering that we've been getting to the extreme other end of the spectrum with the overly sexual ones.   This finally has a balance to fill any fang-fan up to the brim.

Chris Sarandon has a few moments cameo midway through the film.  Which I thought was a brilliant nod to the original {he played the vampire Gerry in the 1985 version }  As well as the inclusion of the iconic dress worn by the character Amy after she's been bitten, and the club scene.
Keeping the monster teeth {which looks very much at times like the teeth of a parasitic leech} was also a great touch as it let you know you were watching a horror film.

The biggest changes beside the location of the story, were Charlie's mother having a larger part in this one, and making Peter Vincent {fearless vampire killer} into a stage magician instead of a horror host. And mixing together both of Gerry and his renfield {played by Johnathan Stark in the original} was an interesting touch.

I await what the film's crew/producers have in store for us next, as a remake of Fright Night 2, I hope is in the works.

BloodRayne 3 (2011)

Plot: Rayne teams up with a group of freedom fighters during World War 2.  She accidentally turns one of Hitler's solders into a vampire who just happens to have the same daywalking powers as herself.  Now she needs to stop him before he can turn Hitler.


This movie even with the unrated director's cut only runs at 78 minutes.  Which is still about 30 minutes too long if you ask me.

I hesitated when I saw this on the movie shelf to begin with as I did not care for the first two.  What ended up being the deciding factor in my renting this was the fact Brendan Fletcher was in it. Who by the by was also in BloodRayne 2 Deliverance.  (As was Michael Pare who I think was the only actor to be in all three of the BloodRayne films. )

I get that the series can play out much like the Crow movies creating new storylines and characters given it is a vampire series, but this one fell really short.

The production of it rang like many made for tv Canadian shows, just a notch above an indie film. And I'm usually all for anything with a vampire or Canadian, but this one left a bad taste in my mouth.
There was little plot, bad dialogue and just felt like a waste of $7

Stake Land (2011)

Plot: Mister picks up Martin after his family have all been killed by vampires.  Together they travel through the United States trying to make their way to Canada, which is now called New Eden. The vampire plague has spread through out the rest of the world, mostly in the South.  Just trying to stay alive, they learn how to kill the vampires, and on the way save a nun from being raped.  Little do they know they have to now deal with the Brotherhood as they make their way to Canada.  The Brotherhood want revenge for them having killed two of their men. Things then heat up when a pregnant woman joins their pack of survivors.


I have to say, I loved this.  Normally I don't care for end of the world films, but this one has a quality to it that makes it dare I say believable.
The vampires in this film look more like the classic ghouls of the Night of the Living Dead films, and the kill count is so that we have one right off the start gate.  No prancing around the topic, you're watching a down and dirty film about the things and people who will pray upon you for no other reason then they can.

After watching this, you can't help but wonder if the creators were sticking their forks into other territory then the undead, which just proves something I've said over and over in the past; the vampire is the best metaphor for everything else we need to talk about.  See the movie, you'll get what I'm saying.

The Insatiable (2007)

Plot: Harry is a shy sales man who likes to help people.  While buying a hot dog for a homeless man, he witnesses the guy being killed by a vampire.  After one of his friends also becomes victim to the female vampire, he captures her but is unable to kill her. Soon he's left with the task of either destroying her or letting her destroy him.

I stumbled upon this film literally in the store. I'd never heard of it before.  I picked it up for two reasons, it's a vampire film I'd never heard of before and it starred Sean Patrick Flanery.

It could be called a remake of To Sleep with a Vampire, it has the same undertone to it. It also had a made for tv feel.
As you watch Flanery's performance, it's easy to get lost in his character and to overlook the sometimes poor sound production.  You believe he's this down on his luck out of touch hero. 

The introduction of the succubus mythology could have been expanded on but otherwise, it's a subtle movie.

My Best Friend is a Vampire (1987)

Plot: Jeremy is a high school kid who just wants a girlfriend.  Roger is his best friend.  While at work one afternoon, Jeremy meets Nora, a sexy older woman who just happens to be a vampire. Soon Jeremy finds himself dealing with more then just keeping up his grades, he's got a vampire hunter on his tail.


This is one of those lost in the shuffle teen movies from the 80's, when teen movies meant something.
It was finally put on DVD just a couple of years ago, but has made it to cult status over the years from being on almost every late night television station movie marathons.

This movie is sweet, funny, and shows that no matter what you're going through, your real friends will always be there for you.   And it has the best line from any vampire film in the last 30 years   "This Blood's For You."

Vampires Suck-2010

Originally posted on my main blog on Aug20th 2010

Midway through watching last night's TNA Impact on iTunes Canada,  I decided it was perfect vampire movie weather, all dark and thunder storms,  so I went to the cinema

Plot: Becca is the new girl to Sporks and there is something odd about the town.  Vampires run around openly feeding.  When she meets Edward she starts to think of nothing but getting him out of his promise ring. Soon, she's the target of a group of evil vampires and must survive long enough to save Edward at their prom from exposing more then just his sagging butt.  The whole while, turning down Jacob and running from his loyal teenaged groupies. Who will survive this in the end, Team Edward or Team Jacob.

I have to say, this was a light way to spend the afternoon.  Half the jokes are slapstick and would work well in any film.  Half the jokes are only useful if you have seen the Twilight Saga.
Casting did a great job finding look alikes to play the core roles in this film.  The best moment hands down is when Edward is depressed with a large vat of ice cream and flat hair. 

Suck-2009

Originally posted on my blog on Aug 18th 2010

Nobody does a rock and roll movie like a Canadian.   Nobody does a vampire movie like a Canadian.

Plot: The Winners are a struggling band who just had their manager walk out on them in the middle of a tour.  While in Montreal, their bass player is seduced by a 300 year old vampire called Queeny.  Queeny has been turning musicians into the undead for years, and seems to be the best rock n roll manager they've ever had.  Soon the rest of the band decide to bite.  But their biggest fan happens to be Eddie Van Helsing,  a vampire hunter who's following them on every tour stop.


This film is genius pure genius!  With rock legends Alice Cooper, Henry Rollins and Iggy Pop and  Clockwork Orange's Malcolm McDowell how can you go wrong.
This film is set in the same vein as Hard Core Logo was. It takes it's subject just serious enough without coming off as cheesy or fluffy.  The soundtrack is packed from coffin to cross with hard hitting numbers, and the style is pure gloss on grit,  just what a vampire film should be filled with.

"Suck"  is a bit Queen of the Damned and a lot of Hard Core Logo, full on with a few rock video moments and surprising Canadian actor cameos (Danny Smith from Big Wolf On Campus plays a gas station clerk) that have you laughing out loud at just the right times.  Moby as a heavy metal meat freak was an interesting twist.

And let's face it,  Vampires and Rock n Roll go together like well, Vampires and Rock n Roll

I rented this off iTunes Canada, but I think I'll be hitting the record store later and splashing out on a copy of the DVD.

Aug 10th 2010

I hate days like today.     My computer had a slight meltdown and I lost like 70% of my stuff.   Photos, essays, videos, music etc.

I was going to weeks ago, do a review on the movie "Lesbian Vampire Killers"   and have no idea what direction to tackle it.   Let's face it,  with a title like that you know it's not politically correct.

I was thinking too of transferring a bunch of old posts from my other blogs like my Alucard's Rose  but thought what was the purpose of that? 

I'm not currently reading any vampire books.   However I did just finish reading  Emma and the Vampires for review.   So you can read that here 
Safe to say, when I have my head screwed on straight, I'll be back to my vampires in full force.   I'm actually looking forward to a few new vampire films coming out soon.   "Vampires Suck",  and "Suck" (starring Alice Cooper)  

Till then.... Creeping Screams!

Jane Slayre Reveiw

Another of the Monster-Lits that are mixing classic novels with Buffy themes.

Plot: Jane Slayre is left orphaned when her family are attacked by vampires. Sent to live with her aunt and cousins who are themselves vampires she is treated like a common servant. In time, Jane is sent to boarding school, where she has to deal with zombies and Voodoo Priests. She graduates and gets a job working as a governess. Here, she learns the house is a readied cage for a werewolf. Distraught Jane runs away to a small village where her Slayre roots are strong and side by side with her new found family/skills she defends the town from more vampires until she is once again needed by her former employer.

I just read this for book club and found it delightful. There were moments when it seemed to drag on, almost like it was trying to cover too many monsters at once.
I don't know how I feel about the zombies to be honest. I think the re-author of this one spent too much time on the zombies and not enough with the history of the vampires. The vampires just seem to be there without any real explanation as to how they got there or why, where as the zombies are given a back history and purpose.
The werewolves too, seemed like they were only added to be added. Though, I do understand the choice of a werewolf as Bertha's character.

I have get to have the book club meeting for this one, so it will be interesting to see if the rest of the book club liked it and what they think.